"You can let me go now"

It was a recent afternoon. Maddox was napping and I was desperately hoping to con Ava into spending some quiet time in her room. I got things set up nice and cozy for her. After she got settled on her bed with her kindle she said to me "you can let me go now."

She meant "you can go now", but those words struck me!

I have ONE DAY LEFT! ONE day. I thought I was supposed to have five long years with her. Those years are over.

The first chapter of being her mama is ending.

Its hard to process. How do I just let her go? How do I drive her to her new school Tuesday morning and leave her there? With a stranger. A nice stranger who seems like she will be an amazing teacher for Ava, but a stranger nonetheless!

I keep thinking back over the past years. Did I do enough? Did I spend enough time with her? Did I teach her what she needs to know? To use her manners and be kind to others? To obey and be respectful? I guess its human to feel like I could've done more.

Of course I could've.

We're entering a new chapter. She really is growing up.

I asked her this evening "How did you get this big?"

She responded "I'll still be your girl."